Humor-filled observations (with the occasional rant) about life (usually mine), love (or lack thereof) and the pursuit of happiness from someone who is constantly told she dances to the beat of a different drummer (I prefer dancing to marching which is just one of the many reasons I would make a horrible soldier). Enjoy!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Bad Moon Rising

I read a story earlier today about a judge in Florida who ruled that a law banning baggy jeans was unconstitutional. We've all seen the baggy jeans look – jeans hanging down practically to the knees with their underwear exposed. Who ever came up with this look? Who decided that it was cool to look like your pants are about to drop at any moment? Although, I have to admit that's it pretty entertaining to watch these gangbangers trying to look tough, while they waddle around trying to keep their britches up. Haven't you ever wanted to just go up behind them and pants 'em, just to see what they would do– or is that just me? ;-)

What gets me is that most people have nightmares about showing up somewhere in their underwear, while the baggy jeans wearing set display their underwear, boldy, proudly, and frankly the rest of of us don't need or want to see it. I believe this was the reason for that Florida law in the first place. However, the law was overturned and the little exhibitionists may once again shuffle down the street in peace.

Now, if that judge had had the opportunity to witness what I did this morning, he might not have been so eager to overturn that law. At one of the bus stops this morning a man got off of the bus wearing extremely baggy pants. Unfortunately, neither his pants (nor his underwear) were eager to join him as he got up, and I was treated to an eyeful of, shall we say, rump roast? Gaaaaaaa! OH, THE HUMANITY! As Creedence Clearwater Revival used to sing, there was a "Bad Moon on the Rise!" Any thoughts I had had of eating breakfast were pretty much shot after that. Ick! Ick! Ick! So once again I say, if that Florida judge had been exposed to what I was this morning, he might have rethought his decision.

You know, if people still insist on wearing baggy pants, I think suspenders really need to make a comeback. For the love of Pete, someone PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE let suspenders make a comeback! It would save the rest of us from some much UNneeded emotional scarring. :-O ;-)

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

What Killed the Night Owl?

I wrote the following blog this morning. I was feeling particularly inspired, as you'll soon see. :-) However, I didn't have access to my computer at the time, so I couldn't post this blog until now. Please remember, these were my thoughts this morning, at the crack of dawn. Enjoy! :-)

What Killed the Night Owl?


I'll tell you what killed the Night Owl...the alarm clock going off at 5 in the morning, that's what killed the Night Owl! Break out the cheese because here comes the whine! :-) I am sooooooooo tired! I can't believe there are people who willingly get up this early! They're usually the ones who pop up, fresh as a daisy, with a cheerful hello and a bright, sunny smile for everyone. You know who I'm talking about... morning people– ugh! You may be shocked to hear this, but... I am NOT one of the them! I know, I know, I can hear the gasps of astonishment. I'm the one who hits the snooze button until the last possible moment, then, when I can't stall any longer, proceeds to stumble through the apartment, eyes half open, knocking over anything in my path in a rush to get to the shower. Believe me, it is not a pretty sight.

So, why am I having to get up so early? Because since my own personal financial crash, I've been taking the bus to work in order to save money. I have to catch it at 6:45am in order to get to work by 8:00am. Hey, hey, I hear those cries of "What is she complaining about? I have to get up at (insert time here)!" Might I remind you that you were warned that there would be plenty of whine in this article? Not to mention that I've already stated: I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON! I am a Night Owl in need of a good nest, uh, I mean rest. I'm actually surprised I'm even this coherent for 7:19am (I've been writing while waiting for the bus, and now while riding the bus). Still not exactly coordinated, as I knocked the bus driver's trash can off the wall while getting on the bus. Oops!

Anyways, you still may be wondering, "Why does her alarm go off so early if she doesn't catch the bus until 6:45am?" Believe me, it's not to get all fancied up (as many of my friends can attest to). It just takes me a looooooooooong time to wake up, thus, the snooze button. I even use my cell phone's alarm in addition to my regular alarm to ensure that I actually wake up. Besides, I also have to factor in actually walking to the bus stop – about 15-20 minutes. Even then I may not be fully awake; I'm usually running on pure adrenaline at that point.

The sad thing is, this is all ruining my reputation as a Night Owl! It didn't used to be unusual for me to go to bed at midnight, if not later. Now if I dare stay up past 10:00pm on a weeknight, I am hating life the next day. I haven't gone to youth group in a while because by the time I get home on Friday I'm beat!

Well, the good thing about riding this bus to work, besides saving money, is that I'm losing weight– HALLELUJAH! Plus, I now get to witness both sunrise and sunset. I had forgotten how pretty those sunrises can be; sometimes it's still hard to tell, what with my eyes being half closed and all! ;-)

So, what started this little tirade of mine? It was this: I began thinking about that old expression, "The early bird gets the worm," and I thought, "What a stupid expression! I mean, after all, who really wants worms!?" :-D See what I mean? NOT A MORNING PERSON (and not exactly in my right mind at this hour... well, I guess nor at any other hour either, but I digress...)! :-)

Well, on that cheery note, I shall end this blog. After all, I'm almost to work now anyway. May you all have a blessed and wonderful day... tee hee! (Aw, man... where did that come from? I must have gotten too close to a morning person, and they're rubbing off on me! Noooooooooooooooooooooooo.........!!!!!!!!!)

:-D

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Learning to Remain Upright!

Wow, this title makes it sound like I could go into some kind of deep theological discussion doesn't it? Hmm... or maybe you think I'm going to relate some story about an embarrassing moment... pfft... yeah, right (at least not tonight). Actually, I'm just going to relate a first in my life and see where it takes us.

Tonight (or actually last night if you want to get technical), I went ice skating for the first time! Woo Hoo! Want to know my thoughts on the way to the rink? They went along these lines:

"I AM GOING TO DIE!!!!" "WHAT WAS I THINKING!?" (I actually seem to be asking myself this quite a lot lately.) "THEY'RE GOING TO HAVE TO HAUL ME TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM AND I'M GOING TO RUIN EVERYONE'S NIGHT!!!!"

I know, real optimistic thoughts, right? It's just that I know that me and slippery surfaces just do NOT get along. You can ask my youth group about a certain camping trip (That's a whole other story). Well, despite these lovely thoughts running through my mind, the whole idea sounded like fun and I had always wanted to go ice skating (glutton for punishment that I am). So a group of us made our way to the rink.

Upon slipping the skates on, visions of spraining or breaking my ankle began dancing in my head. As I rose to my feet, I amazed myself by not falling over! Yay! Then came the really hard part... trying to walk! I think babies learning to walk take bigger steps than I took! Slowly, but surely I began to make my way towards the rink as my friends whizzed by (okay, so they were going at normal speed, but compared to how I was walking, they were whizzing by). I was just happy I was remaining upright!

Before I knew it, there was the nefarious lake of frozen ice looming before me! I just stared at it as my friends began coaxing me towards my doom (or so I thought). At this point, I was thinking: "I can barely walk in these skates, and now they want me to get out on the ice!? HA!" Well, I followed them towards one of the entryways onto the ice and watched as they took off. I was still trying to summon up the courage to set foot onto the rink. Realizing there were a bunch of teenagers now blocking my way onto the ice from that entryway, I backtracked towards another entryway. I then took up my position of once again staring at the ice with uncertainty. I guess I shouldn't say uncertainty because I was CERTAIN I was going to fall if I stepped out there.

Again, my friends came to check on me and attempted to lure me out onto the ice. I declined several times and just worked on walking in my skates. Finally, after realizing that I could never teach on overcoming fear if I didn't practice what I preach, so to speak, I finally stepped onto the ice with my friends. Again, I HAD survived! Then I realized... I can't move! I had no idea how to move my feet, and I couldn't even pick them up. So, I kind of began using the wall to push myself forward and somehow began to make some progress. To say that glaciers move faster would not be much of an exaggeration. I also became very aware of muscles in my calves and lower back that I didn't even know were there. I kept telling my friends, "I can't do this! There is no way I can do this!" Well, somehow I made it to the next entryway and I had a decision to make: Keep going or get off the ice? With a sigh, I kept going. Can't teach on perseverance if I give up now, can I? So inch by agonizing inch I worked on making it around the rink with my friends checking up on me as they made their laps. All I can say is: Thank goodness for that wall! It kept me propped up and helped propel me forward as I tried to get my feet to cooperate.

Finally, about a half hour later, I was back on the other side of the rink. Spotting the exit, I exclaimed, "PRAISE THE LORD, I MADE IT!!!!" A small group of men and their sons were standing nearby and began chuckling and smiling. One of them told me the hard part was getting back off the ice and then offered to help me get off by offering me his arm – at which point I exclaimed, "BLESS YOU!!!!" Who says chivalry is dead? I then hobbled over to the nearest bench and plopped down, which made my feet, calves, and back very happy. Yes, I know, I'm a wimp, but I was a wimp who made it around the rink in one piece! Woo Hoo!

Now, you might think that's the end of the story, but it's not! At some point I did get back on that ice (glutton for punishment, remember?). I figured, how am I supposed to learn if I don't even try? Besides, I had to get my money's worth. I didn't go as far because, quite frankly, that lap was hard enough! So, I came up with a plan: I would skate (my attempt at it anyway) from one end of the rink to the other, get off the ice, and then walk back to the beginning. I figured that would help me practice skating and walking. Now, there was a lot of bench warming before and after each of these attempts, but, eventually, I was able to walk like a normal human being and even move my feet a little better on the ice– it wasn't by much, but I did make it down the ice faster. I tried not to get too proud because you know what they say, "Pride cometh before the fall!" :-D

I didn't skate as much as my friends, but I had fun anyway. And, no, my friends did not abandon me – there was quite a few times they sat and talked with me while they rested. I may not have been out on the ice performing triple axles or even zooming around the rink with speed and grace, but I was learning to walk and remain upright. I called tonight Lesson 1: Learning to Remain Upright. Ooh, ooh, I feel a lesson coming on... now, where is that soap box?

I would have liked to have been zooming around the ice like I used to do at the roller rink when I was little, but that was obviously impossible tonight. I first had to take baby steps. Sometimes, as Christians, we want to be used mightily by God, but we can't just go out there without a foundation. We have to go through a time of learning so that we can grow in God's Spirit, knowledge, and wisdom. This comes by trials, reading our bibles, and praying everyday (okay, ouch, I just convicted myself). A baby has to have milk before it can learn to eat solid food. A juggler has to learn how to handle one object before he or she can move on to two, then three, and so on. I have to learn to remain upright before I can skate. I guess what I'm saying is that we have to learn the basics before we can be used of God like we would like to be used of God. We have to let Him prepare us for what He has in store for us. Whether it's speaking to us through His Word, or giving us an attitude adjustment through prayer, or strengthening us through trials, God knows what it is going to take to make us a vessel He can use. God is our wall (refer to story above)– if we lean on Him, He will support us and lead us to where we need to be.

Okay, now that I have that off of my chest, I believe I can step down from my soap box now. So, will I be ice skating again? Yes, I believe I will, but don't look for me in the Olympics anytime soon. ;-D Oh, and did I mention that I didn't fall once? All of those negative thoughts came to nothing. I SURVIVED! YAY! Hmm... there's potential for another lesson there, but I think one is enough for now. Until next time...

Cindy

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Coming Out Smelling Like a Piña Colada!

Okay, you've heard me whine about it, but now I have the photos from the Great Pie Toss Incident of 2008! After the conclusion of our summer Hallelujah Hands Puppet Club show, I became a living target for our many pie-throwing terrorists... uh, I mean supporters, yeah that's it...

Anyways, I sat through a barrage of whipped cream projectiles as part of a fundraiser. Our puppet club director who was supposed to help relieve me mysteriously disappeared when I sent someone to get her. Hmm...how convenient! I know that vengeance is the Lord's, but we are supposed to be the body of Christ, so I want to be the hands! ;-D As Casting Crowns sings, "If we are the body, why aren't our hands reaching?" ;-D Someone is going down, is all I can say... ;-D (mwah ha ha).

Well, it actually was fun (especially for the kids) and the cool whipped cream actually felt good after burning up all night. Sad to say, it was actually the most fun I had all night, but I won't go into that. After I was finished getting "creamed", I went out to the front of the church and hosed off (I was really covered by the time they were done with me). Knowing that there was no way I was getting out of the incident without getting whipped cream in my hair, I brought along my shampoo and conditioner – which was coconut scented. I then proceeded to wash my hair on an out-of-the-way area on the front lawn. Yes, I know, real dignified, but it was either that or let the cream sour in my hair, and, well... I don't think so. So I finished cleaning up, went to change my clothes, and came back to hang out with my friends who then told me I smelled like a Piña Colada! Well, that's definitely better than smelling like soured cream! Hmm...Is anyone else craving an Orange Julius? :-D Well, anyways below are the pictures that certain people requested I post. You know who you are! Enjoy!

Cindy

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Learning to Keep My Mouth Shut – or Trying to Anyway

Hello, my name is Cindy and I have a problem: I am a smart-aleck! Not that there is anything wrong with that, mind you. The problem comes from giving someone ideas, when you are just joking around– mostly anyway.

Okay, here's the scenario: Picture, if you will, two people discussing the upcoming perfomance of the church puppet club. One of these people mentions that it might be fun to have one of the staff take a pie in the face from the kids as a reward for all the hard work those kids did at practice over the summer. Now, the other person, upon realizing that the final performance will take place on her birthday, then smarts off "Hey, if I'm the one getting the pie in the face, maybe you could charge them since it's my birthday!" Well, that gets the first person excited, especially since she's planning ways of raising money for the puppet club anyway. So, she's asks the second person, okay me, if I'd be willing to do that. I can only attribute my response to the extreme heat, since my brain must have been fried, because I actually responded, "Sure!"

So now I find myself asking, "What ON EARTH was I thinking!?" That's not exactly how I pictured spending my birthday. I had pictured a night out with friends– going to a Knuckledraggers show (they are a local improv comedy troupe) and maybe a nice dinner or something. But nooooooo, I went and opened my big mouth! Oh well, it's for the kids, as I keep reminding myself. And I must say, I'm pretty popular with those kids right now– especially those teenagers, and even some adults! They are all looking WAY too forward to that particular fundraiser. I guess all my orneryness is about to catch up with me. I really need to learn to keep my mouth shut...

Saturday, August 23, 2008

How to Make God Laugh!

Want to know how to make God laugh? Tell him YOUR plans for the future!

When I was growing up I was very, very shy. As a little girl if anyone besides family talked to me, I would hide behind my mother's leg. However, once I hit high school I really started to come out of my shell (some people are probably trying how to figure out how to get me back into that shell). Now I'm doing ventriloquism, puppetry, gospel illusion, singing in church (that's one of the times I really pity the congregation, let me tell you), and doing public relations stuff at work.As a teenager, I wasn't all that fond of kids and didn't really want anything to do with them. However, a cousin of mine who is as close to me as a sister, ended up having a kid when we were both 17. Wouldn't ya know it? That little squirt wrapped himself all up in my heartstrings and suddenly kids weren't so bad.

I had family members and friends who thought I should become a teacher. I used to say there was no way on earth I was ever going to be a teacher. No Way! Huh uh! Forget it! Then as I'm sitting in church one night, right out of the blue, comes this thought: "Maybe I should try being a Sunday School teacher." On the same night, about 5 minutes or so later, I kid you not, the Sunday School Superintendent came up to me and asked if I would consider being a Sunday School Teacher. That about floored me! Well, I ended up saying yes, and have been doing it ever since. The ironic thing is is that I hated Sunday School growing up. I had some bad experiences with it, but because of that I have been determined that the kids I teach don't go through the same thing I did, if I can help it. Now I can look back and say, of my decision to become a Sunday School teacher, it was one of the best decisions of my life. I have a burden for helping children know God and to get saved. We have a lot of hurting children out there who need to know that someone cares.

I've come to the decision that I would like to have kids someday, I think… uh, maybe…okay so the thought still scares me. I used to say to my youth leaders years ago that I was never having children! One of them said that every time I said that, God was going to give me like six. Boy am I in trouble, cause I said that a lot……yikes!

I still marvel at what God has brought me from – a shy little girl who hated Sunday School and wasn't fond of kids to an outgoing (most of the time, I regress every now & then) Sunday School teacher with a burden and love of kids. Who'da thunk it?

Well, whatever happens in the future, I've got God, and He doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called!

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

My Music Playlist




Here is a playlist of some of my favorite songs. It is by no means limited to what you see above. There is still a shockingly low amount of southern gospel on the above list which I hope to remedy soon. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy these songs as much as I do.

Monday, August 11, 2008

A Slideshow of My Artwork



The above is a slideshow of some of my artwork, which I will continue to add to every so often. The mural of the park that you see in two of the photos was drawn by myself and was painted with the assistance of another lady in my church. We pulled a couple of all-nighters to finish that monster! Thank goodness for Starbucks and energy drinks is all I can say. The mural was created as part of the set for our 2008 Easter drama. I was put in charge of designing the set for the first time this year, but it wouldn't have been possible without the help of the fantastic team I worked with. Feel free to let me know what you think of any of the work you see here.