Learning to Remain Upright!

Wow, this title makes it sound like I could go into some kind of deep theological discussion doesn't it? Hmm... or maybe you think I'm going to relate some story about an embarrassing moment... pfft... yeah, right (at least not tonight). Actually, I'm just going to relate a first in my life and see where it takes us.

Tonight (or actually last night if you want to get technical), I went ice skating for the first time! Woo Hoo! Want to know my thoughts on the way to the rink? They went along these lines:

"I AM GOING TO DIE!!!!" "WHAT WAS I THINKING!?" (I actually seem to be asking myself this quite a lot lately.) "THEY'RE GOING TO HAVE TO HAUL ME TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM AND I'M GOING TO RUIN EVERYONE'S NIGHT!!!!"

I know, real optimistic thoughts, right? It's just that I know that me and slippery surfaces just do NOT get along. You can ask my youth group about a certain camping trip (That's a whole other story). Well, despite these lovely thoughts running through my mind, the whole idea sounded like fun and I had always wanted to go ice skating (glutton for punishment that I am). So a group of us made our way to the rink.

Upon slipping the skates on, visions of spraining or breaking my ankle began dancing in my head. As I rose to my feet, I amazed myself by not falling over! Yay! Then came the really hard part... trying to walk! I think babies learning to walk take bigger steps than I took! Slowly, but surely I began to make my way towards the rink as my friends whizzed by (okay, so they were going at normal speed, but compared to how I was walking, they were whizzing by). I was just happy I was remaining upright!

Before I knew it, there was the nefarious lake of frozen ice looming before me! I just stared at it as my friends began coaxing me towards my doom (or so I thought). At this point, I was thinking: "I can barely walk in these skates, and now they want me to get out on the ice!? HA!" Well, I followed them towards one of the entryways onto the ice and watched as they took off. I was still trying to summon up the courage to set foot onto the rink. Realizing there were a bunch of teenagers now blocking my way onto the ice from that entryway, I backtracked towards another entryway. I then took up my position of once again staring at the ice with uncertainty. I guess I shouldn't say uncertainty because I was CERTAIN I was going to fall if I stepped out there.

Again, my friends came to check on me and attempted to lure me out onto the ice. I declined several times and just worked on walking in my skates. Finally, after realizing that I could never teach on overcoming fear if I didn't practice what I preach, so to speak, I finally stepped onto the ice with my friends. Again, I HAD survived! Then I realized... I can't move! I had no idea how to move my feet, and I couldn't even pick them up. So, I kind of began using the wall to push myself forward and somehow began to make some progress. To say that glaciers move faster would not be much of an exaggeration. I also became very aware of muscles in my calves and lower back that I didn't even know were there. I kept telling my friends, "I can't do this! There is no way I can do this!" Well, somehow I made it to the next entryway and I had a decision to make: Keep going or get off the ice? With a sigh, I kept going. Can't teach on perseverance if I give up now, can I? So inch by agonizing inch I worked on making it around the rink with my friends checking up on me as they made their laps. All I can say is: Thank goodness for that wall! It kept me propped up and helped propel me forward as I tried to get my feet to cooperate.

Finally, about a half hour later, I was back on the other side of the rink. Spotting the exit, I exclaimed, "PRAISE THE LORD, I MADE IT!!!!" A small group of men and their sons were standing nearby and began chuckling and smiling. One of them told me the hard part was getting back off the ice and then offered to help me get off by offering me his arm – at which point I exclaimed, "BLESS YOU!!!!" Who says chivalry is dead? I then hobbled over to the nearest bench and plopped down, which made my feet, calves, and back very happy. Yes, I know, I'm a wimp, but I was a wimp who made it around the rink in one piece! Woo Hoo!

Now, you might think that's the end of the story, but it's not! At some point I did get back on that ice (glutton for punishment, remember?). I figured, how am I supposed to learn if I don't even try? Besides, I had to get my money's worth. I didn't go as far because, quite frankly, that lap was hard enough! So, I came up with a plan: I would skate (my attempt at it anyway) from one end of the rink to the other, get off the ice, and then walk back to the beginning. I figured that would help me practice skating and walking. Now, there was a lot of bench warming before and after each of these attempts, but, eventually, I was able to walk like a normal human being and even move my feet a little better on the ice– it wasn't by much, but I did make it down the ice faster. I tried not to get too proud because you know what they say, "Pride cometh before the fall!" :-D

I didn't skate as much as my friends, but I had fun anyway. And, no, my friends did not abandon me – there was quite a few times they sat and talked with me while they rested. I may not have been out on the ice performing triple axles or even zooming around the rink with speed and grace, but I was learning to walk and remain upright. I called tonight Lesson 1: Learning to Remain Upright. Ooh, ooh, I feel a lesson coming on... now, where is that soap box?

I would have liked to have been zooming around the ice like I used to do at the roller rink when I was little, but that was obviously impossible tonight. I first had to take baby steps. Sometimes, as Christians, we want to be used mightily by God, but we can't just go out there without a foundation. We have to go through a time of learning so that we can grow in God's Spirit, knowledge, and wisdom. This comes by trials, reading our bibles, and praying everyday (okay, ouch, I just convicted myself). A baby has to have milk before it can learn to eat solid food. A juggler has to learn how to handle one object before he or she can move on to two, then three, and so on. I have to learn to remain upright before I can skate. I guess what I'm saying is that we have to learn the basics before we can be used of God like we would like to be used of God. We have to let Him prepare us for what He has in store for us. Whether it's speaking to us through His Word, or giving us an attitude adjustment through prayer, or strengthening us through trials, God knows what it is going to take to make us a vessel He can use. God is our wall (refer to story above)– if we lean on Him, He will support us and lead us to where we need to be.

Okay, now that I have that off of my chest, I believe I can step down from my soap box now. So, will I be ice skating again? Yes, I believe I will, but don't look for me in the Olympics anytime soon. ;-D Oh, and did I mention that I didn't fall once? All of those negative thoughts came to nothing. I SURVIVED! YAY! Hmm... there's potential for another lesson there, but I think one is enough for now. Until next time...

Cindy